How Much Per Pound?

Shawna found this news video online the other day:



I watched it and it got me to thinking that this must be an extraordinarily expensive diet (although the guy has a pretty sweet ride; he can probably afford it). At any rate, I, having a desperate hunger for worthless bits of information, wondered how much this diet must have cost the guy, so I started doing some mental math.

I figured that he probably eats three meals a day. If the average McD's meal is $6, then he's shelling out a cool $18/day (quite a lot when you start to add it up--ESPECIALLY if you're Shegazelle!).

I was right. This guy's McDonalds diet is expensive! In a six-month period, he shed about 70 lbs, or about 3 lbs a week (give or take). That eighteen bucks per day rolls up to $126/week, or an INSANE $42 per pound lost!

But is it really that expensive? I did a little web research and put some numbers to a handful of other popular diets, and found that comparatively this is one of the "cheaper" diets out there!

I compared "The McDonalds Diet" to Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, and a handful of other programs, and found that "The McDonalds Diet" is one of the LESS EXPENSIVE weight loss programs out there (second only to NutriSystem, which comes in at $34.27/Lb at 70 lbs of weight loss at an average loss rate of 2 lbs per week). The killer program is "The Zone", an extremely exclusive weight loss program only available in select metropolitan areas. It'll cost you, if you decide to get in "The Zone", a whopping $95.17 per pound to lose that same 70 lbs (at the rate of 2.5 lbs per week).

I've shown the breakdown and comparison below (you'll have to scroll over in order to see the whole thing; Google Docs is amazing, but it has it's weaknesses):



There are two morals to this story, I think.

First, the weight comes cheap (it's pretty easy to put it on); but losing it is VERY COSTLY!

But the more telling thing, I think, is this weight loss program phenomenon. People all over the country are jumping on some program or the other (or making up their own off-the-beaten-path program, like this guy), and paying dearly for it. They aren't buying weight loss though; they're buying discipline. Rather, they don't HAVE discipline, so they're supplementing it with something that'll take off the weight but not be so "uncomfortable."

The truth is, the BEST weight loss program is pretty basic: eat things that are healthy; avoid foods that are high in fat/sugar/carbs (pick your poison; a quick note: the low fat/sugar/carb/etc foods are typically less expensive than the alternative, which says a lot, I'll bet, for the weight management value in Shegazelle's menu); don't be a glutton--leave some on the plate and stop before your buttons start popping.

You see my point? That's no fun. So, instead, we sign up for programs that'll let us eat Ho-Ho's that are specially formulated (and extraordinarily expensive) by some weight loss guru, so that we don't have to "go without". And we pay dearly for them.

All in all, it says much about our society.

My Gift to Alexis and Gentry

NewScientist.com reported this week that curvier women have been scientifically shown to give birth to intellectually superior children.

Apparently, their research has shown that hip fat contains polyunsaturated fatty acids, which contribute greatly to the development of the fetus' brain. They found that children's scores on cognition tests are correlated to their mothers hip-to-waist ration, an indicator of the amount of fat stored on the hips.

I'm digging around here, but I can't seem to find any photographs of Mother, pre-PJ, so I can't say for certain whether or not I'm intelligent. I certainly hope that I am.

On that note, though; my personal research has proven that there CAN be exception, in that Shawna has NEVER had an ounce of extra fat on her hips (or anywhere else for that matter; it's frustrating, I ain't gonna lie to ya). But our children are both still extremely intelligent.

I contemplated this phenomenon for quite a while this evening, and I think I've figured it out.

Those of you who know me know that, during the time Shawna was pregnant with both Lex and Gentry, I was...obese-NO; fat-uh uh; robust-umm...; large-weeell; fluffy-YES! Shawna, on the other hand, was perpetually slim and svelte, despite our unborn children's best efforts to nearly break all known birth-weight records (well, not quite; but they WERE relatively large!). Now, though, I'm a bit slimmer. I now realize that there was a divine purpose in it! I, personally (by virtue of the polyunsaturated fatty acids I stored in my hips-as well as my stomach, butt and face), contributed to the high intelligence of both my children!

I'm quite proud!

I'm sure glad God made me fat! Gave me something to pass on to future generations!